Does your rejection still hurt? After finally accepting that things are just what they are without judgment (the feelings and emotions), I decided that my transformation needs to be framed with structure. Structure is the undergird of all successful woman.  The renewing of my mind included reframing rejection; those NO’s I hated all my life.  The questions, I didn’t ask, because I didn’t want to hear no. 

Wanting all things to be growth moments for self, I framed my questions with intent to get the answers I desired. Accepting accountability of “Self, CEO of H.E.R.”

Rejection to Redirection

Dwelling on the past is a two sided coin, history can teach you, if you let it.  Are you carrying around so much shit that you can’t access your history to gain the valuable insights to create lessons for the future? If not…..

Let the work begins.  Clear out the clutter of all the shit the world has thrown on your back.  Let it go, that’s Letting Go and Letting God, sound familiar, when you began to examine the fact that those things that were said and done, weren’t meant for you to hold and create a narrative in your head to judge you. God does not judge, if you believe that your path was determined before you arrived to the planet, then why would God allow these things to happen?

In the Bible, God says all things work together for your good and he has a plan to prosper you not to harm you? The worlds “perspective” is around us, (it is said or done) for the spirit in you to make a decision, either allow it to form a confirmation or a transformation? Continuing with the believe, God sent his people to transform NOT conform to the “ways” of the world, remember????

On the other hand, the past can impede, if you allow it.  I have always taken the thought process that things are 1.) Done and said 2.) I can held it, looked at it, touched it, and squeezed it to see what came out that was supposed to mean something to me and 3.) Accept it or challenge it. 

But too much of this harmed my personal growth and stunted my spiritual evolution. After all these years, these thoughts played in my head but I never let it change my voice in my belly, my Holy Spirit.   This created a blockage of my spirit to take flight and land in my heart as the seed and liberating my soul to live in the gift of “present”. That ends today

And these regrets, masked “as not being good enough”, “waiting to be selected”, “never feeling worthy enough” and continuous revisits of the past emotional state that anchored me negativity, hindering my personal development and presentation of realizing my potential,  i.e., asking Everett, “can” a project be done through a cost collection project, I explained the situation well, and without an explanation of why it can’t be that way he just said “no”. Tada, I found the problem, I asked a can question to something that I already knew could be done, thus showing the ability of critical thought process.

Then when, I asked, well “can” you help me come up with the answer, after all you are paying me to do a job and this is the way that I understand it, so if you say no, tell me how to fix it so my program can get the job done that need. 

Asking Tom, my second line supervisor questions about processes was pointless, his reply was always, rehearsed, “well that’s the way Everett wants it”, he wanted us to complete an assignment for his boss yet he not able to explain why or what the process is that needs to be done to get the job done that you are asking the team to do. 

Why am I the only person in the room asking these questions, does everyone else understand what is being said or are they just moving like robots, or am I dumb and just don’t understand? After years of this I just stopped trying, why because I was taught not to beat a dead horse, don’t have any expectations even asking several supervisors for what they expected of me to learn, I went to school and I got a report card that told me how I was doing in each subject, you know kinda like the “PEAR” “Performance Evaluation Appraisal Reporting System”, am I not being evaluated on the same level or is there another evaluation system? 

So, my mind went to seeking first the Kingdom of God and there I found the answers:

The way forward begins by “Identifying what keeps us from moving on” after recognizing what is holding you back can break the emotional anchors that tether you in moments of stuckness!

What thoughts are holding you back in the area that you seek growth.  Just by reframing the thoughts of my past am I now able to see the way forward. 1.) I need to be able to present. Sometimes its hard to live in the moment and garner the strength needed to allow ideas to flow that will a yes; that sparks growth

2.) I come alive. Being alive, you talk and become expressive and people love when I am expressive, my true feelings glow through my skin and my voice, my thoughts and I have the spirit to reply accordingly and make the proper adjustments and expand. 

3.) Create your own Path to Success: The way to expansion.

Releasing old values and creating opportunities from the past decisions and actions will guide the path forward.  After replaying these damn scenarios in my mind and wishing I had said or done something differently, now provides the framework and SOP to reframe the guilt shame and disappointments felt. 

Emotional well-being. 

Ask yourself

First question: Where do your emotions lie and create barriers? This is defined by what you perceive as missed opportunities, the wish I would have, or I could have, opportunities because those are the regrets causing the doubt about your current decision and making you afraid to embrace new opportunities and challenges.